Showing posts with label christmas. Show all posts
Showing posts with label christmas. Show all posts

Thursday, 25 February 2010

New Beginings..........





(Began writing this in early January 2010 and have added to it until I was finally happy to publish the post)

Well thankfully 2009 is now well and truly over and  2010 has begun in earnest......... Wishing you all a Very Happy New Year!!


Christmas this year was very difficult for us as the loss of Mum was quite evident as Christmas day dawned. I had been feeling stronger about her loss as the days passed by but something just hit me as I walked the dogs on Christmas morning and as much I tried to fight the tears back it was not to be and spent a good hour trekking across the fields sobbing my heart out... 
I also managed to fall over and break my faithful trusty pop in my pocket camera.. so that just made matters worse!
Thankfully my OH rallied around and helped me with the Christmas meal and jollied me along.... plied with me an intoxicating spirit or two which helped dull the pain!!! 
I have never been so unenthusiastic about a meal and yet it turned out really well!
Later on in the evening we were expecting old friends and neighbours around for tea and so I could go and have a sleep... needed to sleep off the crying and inebriation effects!! OH prepared a lovely buffet which was a huge success...and the evening was enjoyed by all... including me!



Boxing day was a much better day for us all and I was much happier and thankfully I have coped well  since Christmas.. although things hit me emotionally when I least expect it and when it does its quite overwhelming but that is now down to time and the healing that it brings and I just have to allow nature to take its course........
I did have one highlight over Christmas on Boxing day and that was to talk over the telephone for the first time with GTM.... http://greentwinsmummyasimplelife.blogspot.com/. (GMT has since closed this blog and moved to another private blog with invited members only) It was so nice to talk with her as she is such a lovely, lovely lady! I also had a little chat with her darling smalls and it was delightful... the best Christmas present ever!!


I do hope the year ahead will be a lot happier... I do have some plans on the horizon but to be honest nothing is at all clear and I find myself rather overwhelmed with things I would like to do and achieve but all in a jumbled mess... so guess the first thing on my list of achievements this year is to catch up with loads of correspondence and get myself organised. 
I find I am far too happy to sit at my computer and what should only be a little while here and there turns into an hour or two.... 
That is when I can actually see what I am doing on the computer screen!
Bootsie does like this spot and enjoys many a happy nap on my desk!! Often find I am struggling to type around either a tail or a tapping paw..... 
Bold and Basil enjoying a nap together.....

Bootsie in feline dream land... 
Two's company............ 
Basil is in (dare I say it without tempting fate!!) much better health these days and all thanks to our lovely vet who has now sadly left for pastures new and will be much missed as he was a wonderful vet.... will be hard to get used to someone else......
Basil was so ill with stomach/gut problems and still has to have regular medication for the stomach problems but with the medication and a specialised food he has gone from strength to strength and is in tip top health its so nice to see him full of endless energy..... 
He of course still needs to have both hips replaced but due to the stomach problems now under control and his weight managed correctly coupled with the pain killers and joint supplement the hips problems are under control... when things in time take a turn for the worst then hip replacement will become a requirement.... If you saw him run and get about you would have no idea that their was a problem with his hips in fact its impossible to wear Basil out!!
This is the food that has made a MAJOR difference to Basils health. It is quite pricey but I am able to shop around on-line and find it much reduced than purchasing from the vets and as I buy it in a bulk size its nice to have it delivered to my door.


The weather and the big freeze is now the topic of the day and a wonderful opportunity to take some great photographs.......
My friend and neighbour who is also the owner of Syd. We were walking the dogs together that morning and were taking photographs of the most beautiful frosty day!
And then the snow came along....................
Even big girls have to play.... here is 'Snowdonna' and Snowtravolta'!!!

Well things have moved on since the 'snow' and we are slowly but surely heading towards Spring which is much looked forward to for many reasons.
At the moment I am not in the best of health and to cut a long story short I have had some blood tests done as I have been quite low recently and was also taken ill across the fields the other week..... the blood tests are thankfully okay but they have revealed that my immune system is low at the present time. My doctor thinks it is to with my poor sleeping routine of late which in itself is very harmful and I need to get more sleep..... but also the low immune system as allowed me to succumb to a really bad chest and sinus infection. It has completely floored me and I am on my second week of antibiotics.

Sadly I am having to deal with more sadness.... A couple of weeks ago I attended the funeral of my friends husband who has been very ill for the past nine years and suffered from many aliment's including Parkinson's disease and Alzheimer's and finally he lost his life to pneumonia. He was a very dear man with a wonderful sense of humour, positively wicked at times and he will be very much missed!!
This was a photograph I took of my friends husband Jim enjoying a great time during a pre Christmas tea party. Rest in Peace Jim you were very much loved!!


And then early this week I received the very sad news that my Mums Eldest sister, my favourite Auntie had just passed away. Auntie Jean was the grand age of 86 and had enjoyed a very happy and adventurous life and as my cousin (Auntie Jeans son) said to me she had, had a good innings!! But it was a huge blow to me as I adored my Auntie and as a child I had spent many happy hours in her company and I have many special memories of my gorgeous Auntie.....
I wasn't able to attend the funeral for various reasons and this upset me greatly so my cousin told me to get in touch with the undertakers once I had sorted out my floral tribute and I was to have my flowers put on my Aunties coffin alongside his flowers and that was such a sweet gesture that means so much to me.
RIP Auntie Jean, never forgotten and loved forever! xxx
Going through my Mums photographs the other day I found this photograph of Auntie Jean attending her garden. I was staying with her for a few days at the time...44 years ago!!

I also discovered another photograph that really quite upset me as all my family on that photograph have now sadly passed away
In this photograph from left to right:-
My Mum, my Dad, Uncle John (my Mums brother) Auntie Jean (my Mums sister) Uncle Frank (Mums brother) Uncle Reg (Auntie Jeans husband) Auntie Mary (Mums sister) Uncle Brian (Mums brother). The photograph was taken at my Uncle Dicks funeral yet another brother of Mums. Their is only one sister now left surviving and she was the youngest of the family.

Also I found a newspaper cutting of Railway Cottage the childhood home of my Dad and after my Dad left home along with other brothers and his only sister, due to marriage etc. Uncle Frank Dad's youngest brother who never married remained in the cottage until he passed away in 1995 and it was then put up for auction by my Dads late nephew who was the executor of my Uncles Will. It broke my Dads heart to see his childhood home put up for sale and we never knew what happened to the money it sold for or the contents of the house. All that was sent back to us were my childhood school photographs that my Uncle kept on his sideboard. It was heartbreaking as many of the contents were childhood memories for my Dad, old books, ornaments, family photographs.etc My Uncle was an avid gardener and had three greenhouse one of which contained some spectacular cactus plants and I dread to think what happened to them. Dad did not like conflict so let the whole unsavoury situation pass by but it left him very troubled and hurt by family members who he had been very fond of......
I visited the cottage many times as a child and adored it and many times helped to get water from the garden pump (on the right of the picture) until my Uncle finally decided he would be connected to the water mains...
The cottage was situated right by the side of the railway and things been so different in those days in so much as the train drivers got to know my Uncle by sight who was always out in his garden and they would wave, or toot at my Uncle as they passed by and even some of the passengers would give my Uncle a wave.. lovely happy days and the sun always seemed to be shinning!!
The inside of the  cottage was decorated in newspaper and then white washed. As a child I slept in the upstairs bedrooms as my Mum and Dad stayed for a short while to look after my Granddad when my Granny was away ill. I remember the toilet was always outside right up until it was sold and it had the old Radio Times/newspapers cut up for toilet paper, it was one of those toilets that had to be emptied on a regular basis. There was the old laundry outside and the copper inside. It was a long huge garden and in the dell as it was called a dip in the far end of the garden was where my Uncle kept his hens and I was always allowed to go and collect the eggs. It was such an exciting place for a child to be and I have had many happy hours at Railway cottage. I have recently had a look at the cottage on a day when my OH and I happened to be in that area and although a lot of the original parts of the cottage remain as it was a listed property the new owners have built onto it and ripped the garden out and landscaped it to their own liking which is what you would expect but I do regret going back as I disliked how it had been messed around with, guess its right what they say,  you should never go back...........

Feeling somewhat apprehensive at the moment as my husband is due to see his heart consultant today. OH has had a problem with his heart for sometime now and so far had four cardioversions, the first one lasted for five years the other three have lasted no longer than one day and so he has reached his cardioversion limit and his consultant is looking to perform a small operation on my husbands heart that could hopefully solve his problem?? All will hopefully be revealed this morning?

Wednesday, 31 December 2008

Many Thanks, Apologies, Belated Merry Christmas and a Very Happy New Year!!!

Firstly MANY THANKS for all the very kind comments that I have been given over the past weeks . I cannot thank you enough for your kind and helpful words that have touched my heart!!!!

Secondly MANY APOLOGIES to you all for not getting back to you and responding to these most caring and wonderful comments. Also apologies for not blogging of late.. life has been very difficult recently and any spare time I have managed to find I have been frantically trying to get everything ready for Christmas or just plain exhausted!!

I did manage to get ready for Christmas but had to burn the candle at both ends of the day to do so and even ended up staying up all night Christmas eve..... I was so behind with wrapping presents for the family and even putting up Christmas cards and I so wanted to make Christmas... Christmas that it was the only thing I could do.. paid the price though because I was dead on my feet by Christmas night!! But it was nice to see the finished result by Christmas morning and of course watch the family's faces as they opened up their presents it made the lack of sleep worthwhile ......

A few Christmas pictures of the tree etc....


Due to hard times financially we all had to make cut backs this Christmas and my daughter and her partner were feeling the pinch quite harshly this year. My daughters partner has quite a few gorgeous ornaments in his home and I fell in love with one ornament in particular and so in view of this and lack of money my daughter and her partner decided to give me for a Christmas gift the ornament I so adored... and this it is.... a gift that means so much to me and will be treasured forever!!!

I adore owls and I so love this special gift..... Everyone gave very thoughtfully this year and I was given essential oils, organic skincare products, useful clothing for indoor and outdoor wear, some really super wellingtons that are just up my street as I love the Guns and Roses band/music
We also gave useful presents this year... clothes and items that were generally needed with the odd surprise thrown in. I also brought a lot of my gifts of Etsy this year... so many beautiful handmade items that have been greatly appreciated and have most certainly given a great deal of pleasure. I will blog about this and list the many wonderfully gorgeous creative people that I have discovered since blogging. Blogging I have to say has opened a whole new world for me and its a real privilege getting to know so many lovely people. I am overwhelmed by the warmth and support shown to me of late and I have a feeling I am going to be needing a great deal more support during the coming year, which I am sad to say I am actually not really looking forward too... to be honest I am scared of what this year will reveal as it progresses. I have began to have a feeling of dread each morning when I wake now and I almost have to force myself out of bed to face the day.


As many of you may know my darling Mum is sadly becoming more confused and muddled as the days go by. This is what has taken up a lot of my time of late and will continue to do so as time goes by. I do not begrudge my Mum a minute of my time.... but I do find it very hard to bear. My gorgeous rock is slowly diminishing and its Mum who looks to me to get her through the days. Some days she is so vulnerable like a little child and it so sad because I am slowly losing my strong, confident Mum... My Mum who has up until recently been my continued rock, she has shared so much with me. I am an only child and my relationship with my Mum has been so fantastic.. I am very lucky I know but it makes it so much harder as I slowly see her slip away into the fog. Mum has undergone many tests and physically all appears to be well, but mentally something is so very wrong. Mum suffered a stroke as I mentioned in an earlier post shortly after my Dad passed away and things have slowly since then deteriorated. It mainly began to affect Mums way of expressing herself verbally, she could not always get out what she wanted to say and at the moment its very hard indeed for her to get out anything she wants to say which is certainly not helping matters. A conversation with Mum now is almost a guessing game. I have to be her voice wherever we go. Next week I will be seeking further medical help because I need to know what is creating this confusion and muddle. I fear a dementia of some degree, but I need to know what it is what so we can plan and prepare. We are also in the process of filling in an housing application form. We live in a Park Home and have done so for the last 29 happy years. We love where we live, its a great community and we live in the middle of some lovely countryside which I also adore. We are a small Park Home estate and have some wonderful neighbours and friends here. My Mum and Dad sold their house so they could purchase a park home here for their retirement and so have many more of the residents. We sadly do not have the funds to purchase a house and so a council property would be our only option. I am afraid living in our park home has spoilt us and also the surrounding countryside so to move would be harrowing for us all but its becoming that I need to be with Mum 24 hours a day and in our present situation this is not possible. As it stands so far 2009 for us is looking very bleak.

Our gorgeous bundles of fur have helped take our minds of some of our recent problems and here's one or two pictures......







The weather has been very seaonal of late and in my opinion very beautiful and I have of course had to have my trusty camera out to record as much of it as I can... I find walking Basil and the two cats, very theraputic and even more so if I have an opportunity to use the camera... it helps to clear the mind and think things through... I need to have that solitude to survive at the moment.

Here one or two pictures.....





And so to finish... please forgive me my moans and groans... regardless of my own personal thoughts of 2009, I do wish each and everyone of you a VERY HAPPY 2009 and that all your hopes and dreams come true....

Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right.

Oprah Winfrey